Who I am.

I buy kayaks.

Bake brownies.

Reupholster my chairs.

I make spreadsheets and book hotels.

I write out grocery lists and buy new clothes.

I want everything to be right and ready.

That's who I am.

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There's one that survived a cult. She still emails other survivors. The ones who have lost themselves or others. She works with the police. She documents what happens and works on her book. She does t

I spiral. I feel like I did when David told me he had cheated. I feel like I did when Michael said goodbye in the parking lot of San Jose. Or when he left me in the elevator. I feel it rush in my body

When I have no one else, I have me. When I lose everything, I have me. When I’m lost or scared or stuck, I have me. When people say they can’t come. When they’re not free. When they don’t understand.