Starting Life Again

When I write about her, I'm not scared. I know I'm safe in my own home. I don't think she'd even try to find me. But him? Terrified. I...

File bankruptcy. Check. Get a job. Check. Get an apartment. Check. Get a therapist. Check. Change my last name. Check. Get a raise....

It was a year ago. I remember this path I walked. I walked it often. I read my book, watched the deer play, and circled the park at dusk....

When I spend a lot of time working on my book, it happens. I start questioning my sanity. I sit there, paralyzed...panicking. Wanting to...

I miss the feeling of your beard against my fingers. Your smile in the morning when you wake up. Drinking coffee with you in a foreign...

But the battles got bigger. I was 13. I stood up for myself. I fought my dad. I had boundaries. My own voice. Opinions. Courage. Moxie. I...

With windows open, letting in the warm Spring air. A mug of hot water, honey, and whiskey. Wrapped in a blanket as I pour out my heart on...

Sometimes the pain from my past drowns me. I feel like I'm held underwater, unable to get air. I'm reminded of the choices I made. My...

I went from nothing two years ago to this. "Hallie, I can't believe how far you've come," my uncle said as he looked around my apartment....

My grandma was a painter. She used a brush to remember the excursions my grandaddy would take her on. The canals of Venice. The Isles of...

I process by realizing the parallels in people I meet and memories. I try to understand how I'm feeling by remembering when I've felt...

"Hallie, you need to stop dating assholes." "Yeah, it's like I attract them or something..." I said. "No, you're attracted to them," he...

I had just listed all the reasons why my new relationship wouldn't work. The distance from my family. The language barrier. My career....

"That sounds emotionally exhausting." "It is. I'm tired all the time," I replied. But I'm farther now than I've ever been. More myself...

I didn't need wine. Or lots of chocolate. I didn't need sex or bread. I wrote. I wrote and I wrote, and it wasn't painful. It didn't...

I've never met you, but I feel like I know you. I know your laughter late at night. Or the facial expressions you make when you're...

"Eventually, you'll have to choose," he'd say. You can't be cute and cuddly and be taken seriously. You can't be sweet and caring and...

Is it normal to cry after getting a raise? Not out of happiness, but because you feel you don't deserve it? You're reminded of the time...

The night snow blew against my bay window as I wiped the paint off my yoga mat. I let my niece and nephew steal rocks from the parking...

"Envision your perfect day..." I don't know how many times I would listen to that meditation. I'd sit there, legs crossed, trying to...

I hung my apron on the wall. Filled my new glass jars with flour and cocoa. Lit a candle as I softly listened to memories of my past...

That I can completely trust someone to be myself around them and not others. If one friend were to hand me a potato masher instead of a...

Doesn't exist anymore. It's just you and me. When you're awake and when I'm asleep.

I helped her slip off her dance shoes and her sparkly green tutu. We were in the cafeteria after her big Christmas dance recital. My...